“Much unhappiness has come into the world because of bewilderment and things left unsaid.”
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky
I know it’s not something we all want to hear, but honestly – how many of us have left things unsaid? I know that there’s a classic saying that goes “Some things are better left unsaid..” I even tend to agree with this, and somehow it always backfires on me. Has it ever happened to you? Have you ever felt that there is so much you want to say to one person, but when the time comes, you never end up saying it? Does it cause misunderstandings? Does it cause relationships to end? Yes. It does. If you think this isn’t something that has happened in your life, then take a moment to sit back and reflect. Maybe you’ll find that a relationship of yours ended because of this very lack of communication, and lack of talking to each other.. because you allowed the misunderstandings to take over and allowed it to break your relationship.
The flip side? Maybe (and this may come across harsh and blunt) your relationship wasn’t strong enough to begin with. Or you didn’t want to take the time and the effort to make it work. If that’s the case, then you don’t need to read the rest of this post. If it isn’t, then carry on reading.
I am a firm believer of communication, and of bringing things out in the open. If someone has an issue with me, I prefer that they come and tell ME, rather than keep it to themselves, or listen to hearsay from other people. It irks me to no extent when people start believing other people without consulting the person they have the issue with. It has broken many relationships and this kind of non-communication is extremely frustrating. I don’t think there is a problem in just saying what you feel, openly. To the person.
It is OKAY to talk. You can achieve a lot by clearing up doubts, by clearing up any sort of issues you have by talking. Sit down. Shout. Scream. Yell. Be blunt, be harsh. But say what’s on your mind. Stop holding things back. Why are you trying to hurt yourself and the people around you by not saying a word about what is bothering you? Your body language will speak volumes. It will show that you are being hostile, that you refuse to say a word.
I just ask you – any one of you who’ve been in this situation, be it the person who isn’t communicating or the person who is the ‘victim’ (for lack of a better word.) – take a stand. Speak up. If you believe in yourself, and your relationships with people – communicate. You can clear the air, take out the negativity, and be happier if you talk. And if you are meant to part ways, after the talking is done, at least you’ll know that you did it after knowing you’ve talked. So everyone who is in this situation – take a step. Try and talk things out. Believe me, life is just too short to end our relationships with people who are important to us. I know, I’m facing it right now.
God bless, and good luck. x